Stop Listening to Your Inner Critic Before Self-Doubt Robs You of Your Happiness
You aren’t good enough — smart enough — pretty enough.
Why did you take this job? You have no idea what you are doing.
Everyone knows you are a useless idiot.
You’ll never amount to anything
Face Down Your Enemy
Fight those negative whispers. They are your enemy. They prevent you from being who you are meant to be through seeds of self-doubt they plant in your mind.
Your inner critic chips away at your self-confidence and creates the belief that you can’t do anything well. You feel defeated before you begin to try anything new.
It is time to say, “Stop! I’m no longer listening! Enough is enough.”
Eleanor Roosevelt said,
“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.”
Don’t Let the Lies Defeat You
Your inner critic is so convincing, it must be speaking the truth.
The words feel true. So much so, they are difficult to ignore.
The terrible thoughts keep repeating over and over until your confidence begins to falter. You make a mistake or don’t reach a goal and you tell yourself, “I knew it. I am a failure. Why did I even try?”
As your confidence weakens, you make another mistake and you become convinced you are doomed. You know for certain than “never measuring up” is your lot in life.
Self-doubt is devious and quite subtle. It gains strength over time.
But . . . it’s all lies. Those terrible messages that are filling your mind with self-doubt are all coming from fear! They have nothing to do with who you really are.
How You May Lose the Battle
If you keep listening to your inner-critic, self-defeating behaviors like the ones listed below will keep you from living your best life.
1. Believing the Lies
You accept the whispers as truth — you are not good enough — not capable enough — not smart enough – not enough……PERIOD! And you begin behaving as if it were so.
You must fight back.
Hit the mute button and shut it down.
You are enough, you always have been — and you always will be.
Everyone makes mistakes. It’s part of life. No one hits the mark every time. Mistakes are the door to learning.
2. Opting Out
You go into hiding. You rationalize that if you don’t try, you can’t fail, which is safer and less hurtful than the alternative.
You may be right, but, the magic moments of life cannot happen if you are hiding out to protect yourself from the possibility of failure.
Failure is not the end of the world; but, self-doubt makes it feel like it is. Challenge your fears and go for it.
Start with small goals and celebrate the wins. Play them back over and over in your head so you get familiar with the good feelings — and want more. Build your confidence a little at a time.
As your confidence builds, you become tougher, more resilient.
When you falter, it isn’t a disaster. You pick yourself up and start again. No more hiding out.
3. Losing Yourself
There will always be others who can do some things better than you. Making comparisons is dangerous because it prevents you from seeing your own greatness.
You are inherently different from every other person in the world. You have a different perspective on life, different values, opinions, and desires. You are who you are with your own face, shape, size, personality, talents, and abilities. You are unique.
If you are constantly comparing yourself to others, you will never be happy or discover your authentic self.
Rather than help you, comparisons hold you back from becoming the best YOU possible.
If you want to be happy and free to succeed, comparisons must be outlawed.
4. Feeding the Doubt
When you constantly trying to measure up to a superficial standard of beauty perpetuated by the media, falling short is inevitable and self-doubt increases.
Those images are not realistic standards. The photos are airbrushed and photoshopped, plus the models starve themselves to stay thin.
If you reject the way you look because you don’t measure up to media projections of the perfect woman, you will have a warped sense of self that is based on nonsense.
Rather than buy into artificial ideals — learn to love yourself and find your own innate beauty. Every woman carries her own personal form of beauty that should be lovingly embraced without question.
Accepting yourself exactly as you are is the only way to develop a high level of self-confidence.
When you believe in yourself and love who you are, you don’t have to convince anyone else to feel the same way about you, it will happen naturally.
5. Giving Away Your Power
People offer their opinions whether anyone wants to hear them, or not. When self-doubt prevails and your self-confidence is unstable, you are vulnerable to what others say.
If your feeling of self-worth must be validated by the approval of others, you are valuing their opinions more than your own. The real you will get lost in the noise.
I guarantee they DO NOT have your best interests at heart. It is a sad fact of life, but people only care about themselves.
It’s your life and you have the right and responsibility to live it as you choose.
Your Power Lies Within
Trust yourself and be discerning about others’ thoughts and ideas regarding the person you are. It’s okay to reject their opinions and believe in your own greatness.
Trusting in your wisdom takes strength and courage. Be strong — don’t let other voices override your own. Self-doubt can be overcome.
Live in the Now as You Look to the Future
When you challenge and conquer self-doubt, you will have a powerful foundation of self-confidence and self-acceptance from which to live your life.
Viewing the world through that lens makes it possible to accept yourself exactly as you are.
You will recognize and honor the fact that everyone matters and is beautiful in their own way — beginning with yourself.
You deserve to live a happy, confident life. It is up to you to choose it.
You can’t control everything, but you can control your thoughts and the inner critic whose insidious whispers create self-doubt — and believe in yourself.
Keep your inner critic permanently on mute and live a beautiful life — with confidence — for many years to come!
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